On the last day of Christmas,
The Clog gave to me
Twelve skateboard tricks.
That's right children, it totally happened. We have made it to day twelve of Clogmas with minimal pain and suffering. I hope that all of you thoroughly enjoyed your presents, because it sure as shit took every ounce of physical and mental strength to provide you with them. I am sad to say that, much like the little drummer boy, I have no material gifts to deliver anyone. Hopefully mine and Clark's skating will suffice.
On Christmas Eve's eve I dragged Clark out into the freezing cold to experience some unbridled Holiday cheer. We did a few tricks, had some laughs, and pissed off a couple horses. Merry Christmas every last one of ya'll!
Sunday, December 25, 2011
the 12 Days of Clogmas: Day 11
On the eleventh day of Christmas,
The Clog gave to me
Eleven walnuts cracking.
During these long winter nights few things are as comforting as a huge bowl of walnuts, a lobster claw cracker (I think that is the actual use of the tool in the picture), and a hot cup of joe. It is day eleven (I mean not technically), and I could not be happier. Why is that you ask? it is because I already have day twelve ready to go, and after I post it I'll be able to sit back, relax, and overdose on cookies and gingerbread.
The Clog gave to me
Eleven walnuts cracking.
During these long winter nights few things are as comforting as a huge bowl of walnuts, a lobster claw cracker (I think that is the actual use of the tool in the picture), and a hot cup of joe. It is day eleven (I mean not technically), and I could not be happier. Why is that you ask? it is because I already have day twelve ready to go, and after I post it I'll be able to sit back, relax, and overdose on cookies and gingerbread.
The 12 Days of Clogmas: Day 10
On the tenth day of Christmas,
The Clog gave to me
Ten Niner wins.
No other football teams' colors represent the holiday season better than the 49ers. Red and Gold, come on son! A few weeks back a few friends and I attended the San Francisco St. Louis game, and needless to say, it was a blowout. It also gave the 49ers their tenth win of the season, and my tenth day of Clogmas blog post. How's that for a win win situation!
Raw happiness... and hoppiness.
Grill masta Mike.
Burger and a side salad.
"I am the best Robinette," declared Tyler, right before devouring a chicken wing.
the self proclaimed "Best Robinette," in peak form.
The Clog gave to me
Ten Niner wins.
No other football teams' colors represent the holiday season better than the 49ers. Red and Gold, come on son! A few weeks back a few friends and I attended the San Francisco St. Louis game, and needless to say, it was a blowout. It also gave the 49ers their tenth win of the season, and my tenth day of Clogmas blog post. How's that for a win win situation!
Raw happiness... and hoppiness.
Grill masta Mike.
Burger and a side salad.
"I am the best Robinette," declared Tyler, right before devouring a chicken wing.
the self proclaimed "Best Robinette," in peak form.
Saturday, December 24, 2011
The 12 Days of Clogmas: Day 9 (yes I am well aware that by the time I finish this post it will literally be Christmas)
On the ninth day of Christmas,
The Clog gave to me
Nine stollen slices.
Have I failed miserably at providing Clog patrons with meaningful and entertaining posts coinciding with the twelve days leading up to Christmas? I don't think so, because by my count there are still twenty four hours and nine minutes left for me to squeeze in three days worth of Clog presents.
It has come to my attention that it has been quite some time since I have dedicated a post to baking. Do not take this as a sign of me slacking off, because there has been plenty of epic baking sessions going down lately. Today I deliver to you nine slices of stollen, which is a German Christmas bread filled with fruit nuts and other lovely flavors. It is dusted with powdered sugar and looks like a snow covered worm. How can one be certain that this loaf was actually cut into nine slices? Well, how can one be certain of anything these days!
The Clog gave to me
Nine stollen slices.
Have I failed miserably at providing Clog patrons with meaningful and entertaining posts coinciding with the twelve days leading up to Christmas? I don't think so, because by my count there are still twenty four hours and nine minutes left for me to squeeze in three days worth of Clog presents.
It has come to my attention that it has been quite some time since I have dedicated a post to baking. Do not take this as a sign of me slacking off, because there has been plenty of epic baking sessions going down lately. Today I deliver to you nine slices of stollen, which is a German Christmas bread filled with fruit nuts and other lovely flavors. It is dusted with powdered sugar and looks like a snow covered worm. How can one be certain that this loaf was actually cut into nine slices? Well, how can one be certain of anything these days!
Friday, December 23, 2011
the 12 Days of Clogmas: Day 8 (sooooo behind I'm not really sure what the date is)
On the eighth day of Christmas,
The Clog gave to me
Eight legged critters.
I have never done a Clog book review, and that is for good reason. I seldom read, and therefore have little to no authority when it comes to the topic of literature. I do however, have quite some experience in the art of Christmasing. I know this is neither a word found in any dictionary, nor a word most of you are familiar with, but it basically describes the act of celebrating Christmas.
The Cobweb Christmas is a book that has been with me throughout my childhood, and tells the story os an old German widow who slaves away every Christmas preparing her house for friends and neighbors. I wish too keep most of story secret, but let's just say that spiders are involved.
The Clog gave to me
Eight legged critters.
I have never done a Clog book review, and that is for good reason. I seldom read, and therefore have little to no authority when it comes to the topic of literature. I do however, have quite some experience in the art of Christmasing. I know this is neither a word found in any dictionary, nor a word most of you are familiar with, but it basically describes the act of celebrating Christmas.
The Cobweb Christmas is a book that has been with me throughout my childhood, and tells the story os an old German widow who slaves away every Christmas preparing her house for friends and neighbors. I wish too keep most of story secret, but let's just say that spiders are involved.
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
The 12 Days of Clogmas: Day 7 (still way behind)
On the seventh day of Christmas,
The Clog gave to me
Seven Scottish photos.
Scotland always reminds me of Christmas time. Perhaps it is the damp rainy weather, dense greenery, or red and green plaid scarves available on every street corner. Then again, maybe I am just desperately trying to come up with anything to post for the twelve days of Clogmas. These photos were taken over the past summer, and believe me, I have been saving them specifically for these twelve days of online holiday gifting. Does anyone actually believe that?
I took a long walk from our hotel to the seaside town below. It was sunny when I left but the clouds soon returned and drenched me from head to toe.
Then the sun came back again. This I would later learn, was a common occurrence in Scotland.
I can most likely attribute my eventual food poisoning to eating things like this. Totally worth every painful bowel movement I suffered.
Scotland got spots. Stefan's line is gnarly.
Castles just sort of randomly pop up out of the ground like mushrooms in Scotland.
Edinburgh University's campus is flat out breathtaking. It also has some nice granite to tear apart.
Some mo' breathtaking shit!
The Clog gave to me
Seven Scottish photos.
Scotland always reminds me of Christmas time. Perhaps it is the damp rainy weather, dense greenery, or red and green plaid scarves available on every street corner. Then again, maybe I am just desperately trying to come up with anything to post for the twelve days of Clogmas. These photos were taken over the past summer, and believe me, I have been saving them specifically for these twelve days of online holiday gifting. Does anyone actually believe that?
I took a long walk from our hotel to the seaside town below. It was sunny when I left but the clouds soon returned and drenched me from head to toe.
Then the sun came back again. This I would later learn, was a common occurrence in Scotland.
I can most likely attribute my eventual food poisoning to eating things like this. Totally worth every painful bowel movement I suffered.
Scotland got spots. Stefan's line is gnarly.
Castles just sort of randomly pop up out of the ground like mushrooms in Scotland.
Edinburgh University's campus is flat out breathtaking. It also has some nice granite to tear apart.
Some mo' breathtaking shit!
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
The 12 Days of Clogmas: Day 6 (2 days late, damn it's after midnight. I am still two days behind)
On the sixth day of Christmas,
The Clog gave to me
Six idiots at Tommy's.
Xmas lights and amazing humans...
all add to the overall brass of the holiday season. A 49er win over the Steelers mixed with a generous portion of celebration ale don't hurt either.
The Clog gave to me
Six idiots at Tommy's.
Xmas lights and amazing humans...
all add to the overall brass of the holiday season. A 49er win over the Steelers mixed with a generous portion of celebration ale don't hurt either.
Monday, December 19, 2011
The 12 Days of Clogmas: Day 5 (2 days late)
On the fifth day of Christmas,
The Clog gave to me
Five Mikes Hard Lemonade's!
Keeping up with the twelve days of Clogmas has proven much harder than I could have ever imaged.
If ever you are at a party and the only thing available to drink is a Mike's Hard Anything, then you pretty much know things are about to go severely downhill. Don't even try and act like you've never been in such a situation.
The Clog gave to me
Five Mikes Hard Lemonade's!
Keeping up with the twelve days of Clogmas has proven much harder than I could have ever imaged.
If ever you are at a party and the only thing available to drink is a Mike's Hard Anything, then you pretty much know things are about to go severely downhill. Don't even try and act like you've never been in such a situation.
Saturday, December 17, 2011
The 12 Days of Clogmas: Day 4
On the fourth day of Christmas,
The Clog gave to me...
...
... Four boobs...
Yup, that's right, four boobs. I was racking my brain trying to come up with something clever and entertaining for day, but time was running out and I was nowhere near a computer. After skating I became desperate, and asked both Justin and Wayne for ideas on what to post. "Four boobs," Wayne blurted out. I stared back at him dumbfounded, driving several city blocks with looking at the road whatsoever. "Where are we going to find four boobs Wayne," I asked, trying to humor his strange request. "Google images dude," Justin said. "You know we just like, photoshop ourselves in there." Wow.
So here it is, day four. I can't say it's the worst day of Clogmas, seeing as how there are many days to go, but it certainly falls short in the categories of relevancy and originality. This post happens to also be a day late, but given the content does it seriously matter one bit? No, I didn't think so either!
The Clog gave to me...
...
... Four boobs...
Yup, that's right, four boobs. I was racking my brain trying to come up with something clever and entertaining for day, but time was running out and I was nowhere near a computer. After skating I became desperate, and asked both Justin and Wayne for ideas on what to post. "Four boobs," Wayne blurted out. I stared back at him dumbfounded, driving several city blocks with looking at the road whatsoever. "Where are we going to find four boobs Wayne," I asked, trying to humor his strange request. "Google images dude," Justin said. "You know we just like, photoshop ourselves in there." Wow.
So here it is, day four. I can't say it's the worst day of Clogmas, seeing as how there are many days to go, but it certainly falls short in the categories of relevancy and originality. This post happens to also be a day late, but given the content does it seriously matter one bit? No, I didn't think so either!
Thursday, December 15, 2011
The 12 Days of Clogmas: Day 3
On the third day of Christmas,
The Clog gave to me
Three ripping rippers.
Christmas could greatly be improved by eliminating the need to buy others gifts. Take a look at Thanksgiving for example. You've got food, friends, family, football, pie, food, drinking, food, beer, wine, food, without the hassle of shopping. Most of us have enough material bull crap cluttering up our lives as it is. That is why I feel it is perfectly acceptable to regift something that was previously given to you.
Just about all of the tricks featured in this montage have already been used for one project or another over the course of several years. But just like that blender you received for your birthday last year, I am rewrapping these clips with sparkling paper, tying a nice bow around them, and giving them back to you this holiday season.
P.s. In case any humans were wondering, Jon's line with the 180 over the rail is my favorite line ever.
The Clog gave to me
Three ripping rippers.
Christmas could greatly be improved by eliminating the need to buy others gifts. Take a look at Thanksgiving for example. You've got food, friends, family, football, pie, food, drinking, food, beer, wine, food, without the hassle of shopping. Most of us have enough material bull crap cluttering up our lives as it is. That is why I feel it is perfectly acceptable to regift something that was previously given to you.
Just about all of the tricks featured in this montage have already been used for one project or another over the course of several years. But just like that blender you received for your birthday last year, I am rewrapping these clips with sparkling paper, tying a nice bow around them, and giving them back to you this holiday season.
P.s. In case any humans were wondering, Jon's line with the 180 over the rail is my favorite line ever.
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
The 12 Days of Clogmas: Day 2 (sort of)
On the second day of Christmas,
The Clog gave to me
Two video posts in one day!
We shall journey even further back to a time when I still had a GL 2 and my virginity. As the title indicates, I created this pointless little video for Jesse on a whim. It contains virtually no entertaining moments, so I shall clarify a few things in the next paragraph.
Kevin Calderwood made this video for me...i dont know y
Bone | Myspace Video
At the time I thought I was being very clever by combining found writing on a playground slide with final cut titles to spell out something comical. In retrospect it was just childish. The grey shirt conflict, as it later became known as, makes me chuckle to this very day. My reaction to Jesse wearing my only grey t-shirt is one of complete betrayal and disgust. It makes me wonder why I do not posses such a shirt now. For those one you looking to buy me a Christmas gift, I will gladly accept medium blank grey t-shirts by either Hanes or Fruit of the Loom. Come on, I know you're already wondering through Macy's as you read this, so why not pick up a four pack of shirts? Chances are they'll be way cheaper than whatever the hell you're going to buy for who
gives a shit.
The particular crew in attendance during the grey shirt conflict is also something to marvel at. It consisted of a very young Wayne Mills, Jesse Rose, Andy Aced, and if you look closely, a Ryan Eicholtz. What brought us all together that day will always be a mystery to me, but what remains important is the almighty grey shirt of destiny.
The Clog gave to me
Two video posts in one day!
We shall journey even further back to a time when I still had a GL 2 and my virginity. As the title indicates, I created this pointless little video for Jesse on a whim. It contains virtually no entertaining moments, so I shall clarify a few things in the next paragraph.
Kevin Calderwood made this video for me...i dont know y
Bone | Myspace Video
At the time I thought I was being very clever by combining found writing on a playground slide with final cut titles to spell out something comical. In retrospect it was just childish. The grey shirt conflict, as it later became known as, makes me chuckle to this very day. My reaction to Jesse wearing my only grey t-shirt is one of complete betrayal and disgust. It makes me wonder why I do not posses such a shirt now. For those one you looking to buy me a Christmas gift, I will gladly accept medium blank grey t-shirts by either Hanes or Fruit of the Loom. Come on, I know you're already wondering through Macy's as you read this, so why not pick up a four pack of shirts? Chances are they'll be way cheaper than whatever the hell you're going to buy for who
gives a shit.
The particular crew in attendance during the grey shirt conflict is also something to marvel at. It consisted of a very young Wayne Mills, Jesse Rose, Andy Aced, and if you look closely, a Ryan Eicholtz. What brought us all together that day will always be a mystery to me, but what remains important is the almighty grey shirt of destiny.
The 12 Days of Clogmas
On the first day of Christmas,
The Clog gave to me
A teaser for a video that never came to be.
In honor of the season, I am dedicating the next twelve days to showering Clog patrons with an assortment of enticing gifts and goodies. I am aware that I am starting a day late, but rest assured I came up with this idea yesterday. I am just going to have to post twice today to make up the difference.
Journey back to a time when Carson and I had just begun skating with each other and no one rode for any sort of sponsor. Everyone was young innocent and bursting at the seems with motivation. Jason Strubing was in the early stages of orchestrating another Skateworks video but needed someone to film and edit it, seeing as how Kyle had hit the big time. Naturally Carson and I jumped at the opportunity. However, nothing ever fully materialized and most of our and editing skills footage went to Kyle's mutant side project, Turd Life. This trailer is the only evidence of the long lost Skateworks video.
The Clog gave to me
A teaser for a video that never came to be.
In honor of the season, I am dedicating the next twelve days to showering Clog patrons with an assortment of enticing gifts and goodies. I am aware that I am starting a day late, but rest assured I came up with this idea yesterday. I am just going to have to post twice today to make up the difference.
Journey back to a time when Carson and I had just begun skating with each other and no one rode for any sort of sponsor. Everyone was young innocent and bursting at the seems with motivation. Jason Strubing was in the early stages of orchestrating another Skateworks video but needed someone to film and edit it, seeing as how Kyle had hit the big time. Naturally Carson and I jumped at the opportunity. However, nothing ever fully materialized and most of our and editing skills footage went to Kyle's mutant side project, Turd Life. This trailer is the only evidence of the long lost Skateworks video.
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
Wine and Cocoa Puffs
It is my firm belief that the morning is most crucial point of the day. If I awake in a state of absolute stokeditude I could care less about what the rest of the day brings. Greeting the day with a feeling of purpose and motivation is infinitely unfuckwitable.
If the morning has such great potential for greatness, then there must be equal chance for horrible failure. I usually view the posting of youtube videos as a sign of blog laziness, but when the blues strike early in the morn, nothing quite fits like this video. The Cold Water says it all. Apparently cereal wine and guitar can cure the cold water blues.
Here is a photograph of two individuals existing on opposite ends of the morning mood spectrum. Which one woke up with the cold water?
If the morning has such great potential for greatness, then there must be equal chance for horrible failure. I usually view the posting of youtube videos as a sign of blog laziness, but when the blues strike early in the morn, nothing quite fits like this video. The Cold Water says it all. Apparently cereal wine and guitar can cure the cold water blues.
Here is a photograph of two individuals existing on opposite ends of the morning mood spectrum. Which one woke up with the cold water?
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
The Best/Worst Shit Ever Vol. 3
If you are planning on trimming your nose hairs...
you may as well do it while driving through a busy intersection. And by golly, why not smoke a cigarette in the process.
you may as well do it while driving through a busy intersection. And by golly, why not smoke a cigarette in the process.
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
Monday, October 31, 2011
Game Six
Post smogcheck celebratory ceramic day of the dead skulls filled with tequila are normal right?
Chase had been waiting for this day since he was born. Before we even turned on the tv The Rangers scored a run, which meant a shot for Newt Dawg.
Shot number two came faster than you can say "faggot fuck," which at some point became Chase's go to phrase.
Chase using his yell at the screen coaching technique to get "his boys" fired up. It's a miracle Josh's tv and dvd player survived the ordeal.
Much to Chase's delight, and his liver's displeasure, Texas seemed to be on quite the hitting streak. Shot number three may have come a little early.
As the sun gently tiptoed away Chase had a smoke on the balcony. This may have been the last time our young friend looked sane during the night.
Because right afterward it was back to taking shots.
A full hand worth of tequila shots.
I may in fact get the picture framed and mounted over my fireplace.
Chase enlisted the help of other people's fingers to help him count shots.
Things started looking pretty bleak for the Cardinals.
The wellbeing of Chase didn't seem to promising either.
But what is this? A miracle home run.
Pure Anguish.
Into the mouth of madness.
Ah but wait, shot number nine and a smiling Chase means that things began to turn around for the Rangers. And yes, I must have missed a few pictures of shot tequila drinking along the way.
However, a focused phone is never a good sign. Or is it a great sign?
Either way, there is always next year.
Ps. Chase I have a your favorite sweatshirt.
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
Guilty Fall Pleasures Vol. 1
Nothing quite reminds me of fall like ingesting a steaming cup full of artificially pumpkin flavored coffee sludge.
The Pumpkin Spice Latte from 7-11 is anything but a latte, but it's curiously addicting and brings me back to my coffee drinking roots. A time when the last thing I wanted to taste in my coffee was, well, coffee.
The Pumpkin Spice Latte also tastes especially good out of a 99 cent 12 oz Domo coffee cup. This deal however, was only available for a limited time a couple years back, and I feel as though me and my buddy Justin Albert were the only ones who took advantage of this.
The Pumpkin Spice Latte from 7-11 is anything but a latte, but it's curiously addicting and brings me back to my coffee drinking roots. A time when the last thing I wanted to taste in my coffee was, well, coffee.
The Pumpkin Spice Latte also tastes especially good out of a 99 cent 12 oz Domo coffee cup. This deal however, was only available for a limited time a couple years back, and I feel as though me and my buddy Justin Albert were the only ones who took advantage of this.
Monday, October 24, 2011
Hell on the Horizon
Not quite my pretties, but we are getting close. Listen to the wind and sharpen your razor mittens.
Thursday, October 20, 2011
Objects of October
Could it be, the almighty "Root?"
Unless you eat a shit ton of candy corn pumpkins the season is not yet complete.
Deck the halls with hell and folly!
This man should have graced the blogger account of the Clog ages ago. Behold artgrove69.
Friends.
Enemies.
Best friends!
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
"It's an Evil Fucking Room"
How did John Cusack make the transition from wimpy roles in films like High Fidelity, to becoming the new reigning king of psychological horror? Ah, the wonders never cease.
If Samuel L. Jackson warns you not to stay somewhere, well then dear God, you had better take his advice. The fact that John Cusack looks Sammy J. right in the eyes and tells him, "I'm taking the room," speaks volumes about how much of a straight up G he really is. 1408 was greeted with very little love upon it's release, but don't be fooled, this psychological brain rape of a film boasts some serious solo acting, awesome lighting, and genuinely suspense filled moments.
"Hotel's are a naturally creepy place, How many people slept in that bed?"
It has been white some time since I last viewed this masterpiece of horror cinema, but I know for a fact that it is worth staring glassy eyed into into your television screen for. And now that I think about it, both of these films take place in a hotel/motel (what the hell is the difference???). Is Cusack really the king of horror, or simply the master of hotel thriller? You be the judge.
If Samuel L. Jackson warns you not to stay somewhere, well then dear God, you had better take his advice. The fact that John Cusack looks Sammy J. right in the eyes and tells him, "I'm taking the room," speaks volumes about how much of a straight up G he really is. 1408 was greeted with very little love upon it's release, but don't be fooled, this psychological brain rape of a film boasts some serious solo acting, awesome lighting, and genuinely suspense filled moments.
"Hotel's are a naturally creepy place, How many people slept in that bed?"
It has been white some time since I last viewed this masterpiece of horror cinema, but I know for a fact that it is worth staring glassy eyed into into your television screen for. And now that I think about it, both of these films take place in a hotel/motel (what the hell is the difference???). Is Cusack really the king of horror, or simply the master of hotel thriller? You be the judge.
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